Sharks and Mermaids
by demimonde
Summary: Sakura Haruno was of the mind that if life gave you lemons, then make lemonade. With this latest arrangement, she really didn't have a choice but to do just that. And maybe, if she was lucky, it would be more sweet than sour. High school AU.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Naruto does not belong to me.

**Sharks and Mermaids **

_Chapter One_

* * *

><p>"K-Kisame-senpai?"<p>

"What!"

"W-where sh-should-"

"Quit your stuttering, kid! Towels go on the metal rack!"

The poor, unfortunate soul paled before clamboring away from the intimidating senior and captain of the Konoha swim team. Kisame inwardly groused about incompetent, snotnosed freshmen whose sole purpose of trying out for the swim team and therefore wasting his precious time was to ogle each other. Half the little shits didn't even know how to fucking swim!

"Again!" his baritone thundered, ordering this year's fresh meat to do another lap from one end of the pool to the other. _Fucking pathetic._ He shook his head, watching as half of the tryouts flailed and flapped in the water, barely able to keep themselves above water.

"You! Number twelve! Do I need to get you a fucking floaty? Move your arms and legs!" Kisame shouted.

"I think he might actually be drowning," came a soft, slightly amused feminine voice.

"Number twelve! Move!" he yelled before glancing over his shoulder to look at the owner of said voice. He snorted and turned back towards the pool. "Botany is three doors down in the greenhouse."

"And apparently Assholeville is right here."

Kisame raised a brow at the unexpected snarky reply and promptly gave her his full attention. "I don't suffer foolish, doe-eyed fangirls lightly, so if you're here to drool over your little shirtless crushes, then I advise you find another club."

"If you're done making assumptions about me because of my _pink_ hair and _beautiful_ green eyes, I'm Sakura Haruno, third year transfer student from Okinawa."

"You, number ten!" Kisame shouted, curious eyes never leaving her.

"Y-yes, Kisame-senpai?"

"Help out number twelve! He's drowning!"

"Y-yes, Senpai!"

She swallowed a laugh after quickly glancing at the floundering pair. "I know I'm a little late for tryouts, but considering I'm new here, cut me some slack? Promise, I can swim."

Kisame regarded her with a critical, if not slightly amused, eye. Pink hair. Bright green eyes. Flawless, slightly sun-kissed skin. A lithe body from the looks of it and a smart mouth. He sighed. She couldn't possibly suck as bad as some of these dopes. At least he hoped anyway.

"Suit up, Haruno, and show me what you got."

Twenty minutes later, Kisame was _fucking in love_.

"Who's the hot bitch?"

"You're late."

Hidan smirked. "Bite me. Can't help that the ladies love this," he said, motioning to his rather impressive physique.

But Kisame wasn't paying attention. He was focused on the pink haired _fucking mermaid_ - because that was the only way to describe her at the moment - cutting through the water with such ease and killer precision, it almost made him want to cry. Damn, it was like she belonged there.

Hidan grinned, wide and showing entirely too much teeth as he stood with Kisame and observed her final lap. "We're keeping her."

Kisame nodded, pleased that swim tryouts weren't a complete bust. "Sakura Haruno. A third year transfer from Okinawa. You'll like her."

"I already do, _Kisa-kun_. Do you see that fucking perfectly perky ass?"

Kisame rolled his eyes. Hidan was just one big walking erection, ready and willing to do it with just about anyone. Hell, he wouldn't be surprised if the manwhore had already tapped half, if not all, the school's female population.

"Alright! Line up!"

Sakura hauled herself from the pool, wondering if all the tall senior with the shock of dark blue hair ever did was shout. He certainly did cut an impressive figure though. Well over six feet, broad shoulders and from what she could tell, cut like steel and powerful. He was likely a shark in water as his build was similar to another human fish she knew. Zabuza could probably give him a run for his money if they ever met.

Toweling off, she made her way over, noticing another who hadn't been there earlier. _Seriously? What is up with this place and ridiculously good looking guys? _Konoha Academy seemed to have them in droves. Letting loose her bun, she finger-combed her long wet pink hair and quietly waited for more shouting.

"For those who don't know me, I'm Kisame Hoshigaki, co-captain of the swim team. This guy next to me is Hidan, your drill master for the year. Numbers I call out, stay. Numbers I don't, well, too bad. There's always mid-year tryouts."

Brutally honest and a bit cantankerous he might be, but Sakura couldn't help but like this Kisame for all the thirty minutes she had known him. Looking around at the others as he began shouting numbers, she realized there were quite a few hopeful recruits. A lot actually...females and males in about equal quantities. She wondered where the current members were, if any, and how many of them would actually make it. Aside from number twelve and a few others, she hadn't seen her other competition. She being here was more on a whim than anything, to test her luck and perhaps courage. She'd overheard about swim tryouts from a group of twittering girls yesterday.

"Haruno!"

Sakura blinked, tucking a stray strand of pink behind an ear as she turned her attention towards the swim captain and drill master. "Yeah?"

"Welcome to the team."

She wasn't sure how to feel about the grins on both their faces though. It was almost creepy and most definitely troublesome with a big fucking capital T.

…

Sakura Haruno was of the mind that if life gave you lemons, then make lemonade. With this latest arrangement, she really didn't have a choice but to do just that. Her dad had decided to pick up and move back to the northeastern Konoha prefecture of Japan, citing what a wonderful change it would be for his little girl, who wasn't quite that little anymore, and how great it would be for dear Otou-san to finally show her his roots. Konoha was home for him after all. It wasn't for _her_, but she didn't have the heart to tell him.

She loved him too much to smack down his idealistic notions and so, had grudgingly agreed and prepared to say goodbye to old friends and perhaps one of the most beautiful scenic views of the ocean. Their small seaside village would be sorely missed. Admittedly, her dad had had to peel her fingers from the walls and doors of their old home and bear witness to her and her dearest friends' pitiful, wailing cries and the fattest tears this side of Okinawa had to offer. Suffice to say, it had been a most painful parting.

And now here she was, walking through the open door of their rather quaint apartment ten blocks from the academy. No father in sight. Or ocean for that matter. And with conflicting feelings about what she'd just gotten herself into. Sakura didn't know much about Konoha Academy, just that it was pretty prestigious and boasted quite an elite, or maybe rich was a better term, population of students. She wasn't dumb. She was quite intelligent actually, despite her girlish and flowery coloring. She'd earned her right to attend, but still, it was always tough starting all over again.

She dropped her bag on the tatami mat of their small living room and heaved a sigh. She should start dinner for them. No doubt he'd want to hear all about his blossom's first day of school. She was still debating though whether she should tell him about the swim team. Maybe that could wait a few days. Then again, the possibility of scantily clad boys ogling his little girl...he did have a mighty hyperactive imagination so maybe Sakura would just keep it to herself for now.

…

_Shit! _She was late and Tsunade was going to skewer her! Flying past the heavy iron gates of Konoha Academy, she nearly crashed head first into someone, but swerved around him just in time. Her shoulder hit his however, and she watched in dismay as he was thrown a bit off balance. But she was _really _late and couldn't spare the time to stop and check if he was all right.

"I'm sorry!" Sakura apologized, half turning mid run and tossing him an apologetic smile. Noticing who was standing next to the guy she had almost bulldozed, she quickly shouted a 'G'morning, Kisame-taichou!' before continuing her sprint towards the administration office.

…

"Kisame?"

"Yeah?"

"Care to explain?"

It took a second for the blue-haired senior to understand what he meant as they continued their walk to class. Sharkish grin curving Kisame's lips, he threw up his arms and laced his fingers behind his head. "You just met a fucking mermaid."

Itachi Uchiha slanted a look his way that clearly said he was not amused.

Kisame laughed, throwing an arm around the Uchiha's shoulders. "Sakura Haruno, third year transfer from Okinawa and new member of the swim team. Since you couldn't be there yesterday, you'll see what I mean later."

"Hn." Itachi wouldn't deny that his interest was piqued. Long strands of soft pink. Deep green eyes. A full, cupid bows mouth. Skin kissed by the sun. No doubt telling of time spent on the beach. He hadn't gotten a good enough look at her, but he knew beautiful when he saw it, however quick it had been.

"U-Uchiha-senpai?"

He paused and turned to look over his shoulder, Kisame doing the same only to smirk when he saw the tell-tale sign of a lovestruck fangirl. In Itachi's case, much of the young female population of Konoha Academy. Though he would bet the younger Uchiha brother could give him a run for his money. Sasuke had the mysterious, aloof bad boy schtick down pat.

The cute brunette reddened, stuttered, and then pushed a neatly folded piece of paper into Itachi's hands before bowing and scampering away like a nervous doe. Itachi sighed amid Kisame's snickers.

"What is that? The tenth one this morning?"

Itachi stuffed the love letter, along with all the others, into a pocket of his bag. It was nothing new, these love confessions. But Itachi honestly wondered why these girls wasted their time on him. He would never return their affections. Aside from being polite and mostly nonchalant about such things, nothing would ever come of it.

"Fucking Uchiha! Would it kill you not to look so serious? My eyes fucking hurt just looking at you," Hidan groused, slinking his way towards them.

"Hidan…" Itachi greeted, ignoring the barb.

"Fuck, did you do yesterday's assignment?"

Kisame groaned, he'd completely forgotten about it too.

"Yo, Uchi-"

"Tough shit," Itachi cut in, walking away with little remorse. "And I hear the next volume of Icha Icha's been delayed too. Poor Hatake-sensei..."

Kisame and Hidan both cursed. That meant cleaning duty. _Shit_.

…

"I joined the swim team."

Tsunade almost choked on her morning coffee. "You did what?"

"I joined the swim-"

"I heard you," the buxom headmistress of Konoha Academy interrupted, concern almost marring her brow.

Sakura narrowed her eyes. "Promise you won't interfere. Otou-san's enough."

Tsunade's lips thinned before she sighed in resignation. "I know you can take care of yourself, Sakura, but…"

"It's a little scary here and I don't really know anyone, but I'll be fine. I'm not five anymore."

"But you're still _my_ _niece_."

Sakura gave her a reassuring smile. "And you're Tsunade-sama, hardass headmistress of the great and wonderful Konoha Academy."

"Sakura…"

She flashed a cheeky smile and winked. "But you'll always be Aunty Tsutsu to me. Don't worry, okay?"

Tsunade shook her head, taking another sip from her half full coffee mug. "Promise you'll let me know if you need anything?"

"Promise."

"And watch out for those swim boys. They may look harmless..."

Sakura snorted. "They're far from harmless, Aunty Tsutsu. I'm pretty sure they're downright manic."

"You always were a good judge of character," Tsunade said approvingly.

Getting up to leave, Sakura paused and glanced over her shoulder. "I jumped into a pool of sharks, didn't I?"

Tsunade smirked. "Maybe. But they don't bite...much."

* * *

><p><strong>…<strong>**_to be continued…_**

* * *

><p>Always wanted to do a highschool AU with members of the Akatsuki. Consider this baby slice of life? I dunno. Mostly light-hearted stuff. Inspired by my binge re-watching of Ouran High School = LOVE.<p>

-dm


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Naruto does not belong to me.

...

**Sharks and Mermaids  
><strong>_Chapter Two_

**…**

Konoha Academy was an impressive building, partitioned into several wings, classrooms, and activity rooms, from a gym and pool to a greenhouse and ballroom. The hallways were spacious, the library endless, and grounds well kept. While the academy didn't scream extravagance or excessive, it wasn't exactly lacking. Maybe it was more of a subtle prestige? Sakura inwardly nodded. KA knew it was the best, but didn't needlessly flaunt it. Most of the time anyway.

Walking down the hall, Sakura plucked at her uniform. A long black button cardigan with a white collared shirt under, finished at the neck with a loose bow. Her red skirt fell mid thigh and below that, a pair of black above-the-knee socks and penny loafers. Her dad had gushed about how adorable she looked and her response had been an eyeroll. She could've been wearing a potato sack and his reaction still would've been the same.

Lost in her musings, she almost missed the ring of the bell. Looking around and finding herself one of the last students in the hallway, she picked up her pace, hoping she was going in the right direction. Glancing up at the room signs, she breathed a sigh of relief when she spotted Classroom 1-b.

After her meeting with Tsunade, Yuhi-san had flagged her over to her office and informed her that, based on Sarutobi-sensei's recommendation, she'd be placed in a more advanced class. Sakura didn't have much time to contemplate it as she'd been promptly shooed out the office when the phone started ringing.

_Well, it's now or never, Sakura._ With a deep, steady breath, she walked through the open doorway.

"Yo! Saku-chan!"

Was it dread that just snaked down her spine? Sakura slowly turned toward the sound of Hidan's enthusiastic shout and offered a weak wave before approaching Hatake-sensei.

**…**

"So what're you doing here?" Hidan asked ten minutes later, leaning over to rest his chin on her shoulder. It just so happened that the only available desk was right in front of him.

Sakura glanced at him. "Being challenged. Advanced placement is what I'm supposed to call it."

Kisame hmmed from the desk right next to her. "A fucking mermaid and smart to boot."

"Saku-chan?"

"Why're you calling me that?"

"Because you're _fucking cute_."

Sakura snorted, smacking him on the shoulder. "Flattery will get you nowhere."

"Do it again, babe. I like it when you hit me," Hidan winked, a playful gleam in his burgundy eyes as he sat back in his chair.

She raised a brow, looked at Kisame who mouthed _masochist_, and shook her head. "Unreal…" she whispered, laughing to herself.

Glancing in front of her, she absently noted long black hair in a low, loose ponytail and broad shoulders covered by the academy's standard red blazer. She figured he must be friends with Kisame since she had seen them together earlier and really, she owed him a proper apology. Leaning forward, Sakura tapped him on the shoulder. When he turned around, curiosity flickering across his too dark eyes, she melted a little inside._ Damn, seriously? Ino would be having a conniption right now if she knew how many hot guys were here._

"Er...sorry about earlier. I was in a rush and didn't mean to run you over. I'm Sakura, by the way. Nice to meet you," she said, flashing him a warm smile and somehow, unable to shake the feeling of familiarity.

"Itachi. Nice to meet you too, _Sakura_."

**…**

She smelled fresh, with a hint of citrus, and summery. He'd half expected her to carry the scent of flowers. She looked like one enough. Hidan wasn't right about a lot of things, but he had to agree with him on this one. She was fucking cute, beautiful even for all her seemingly delicate features.

"Saku-chan…yo, Saku-chan!"

Itachi hid a smirk when he heard her sigh and grumble about irritating drill masters.

"What?" she hissed over her shoulder.

"My pencil fell. Grab it for me, will ya?"

An chalkboard eraser came flying from the front of the room, easily dodged by Itachi and an oblivious Sakura who had bent over. It landed squarely in Hidan's face and when Sakura turned around, it was to find a white cloud of dust and a nice rectangular imprint in the center of his good looks.

"Totally uncalled for, Hatake-sensei!"

"Oh, sorry. My arm slipped."

**…**

"H-Haruno-senpai?"

Pulling the strap of her swimming suit over her shoulder, she turned around and smiled at the group of young freshmen girls creeping their way closer. They were adorable, wide-eyed little things.

"Yes?"

One of them stepped forward. Moegi was her name, if Sakura remembered correctly.

"P-Please teach us!" The declaration was followed by emphatic nodding and eager eyes on the verge of desperation.

"Yeah, Haruno-senpai! Teach us!"

Flattered, Sakura waved away their earnest murmurs. "Swimming just takes practice."

Silence followed before the group deflated. "Not swimming, Haruno-senpai," clarified Moegi. "B-Boys. Teach us how to get boys."

Sakura's eyes widened, trying hard to fight back the laughter and-if she were to be truthful, the small amount of dawning horror-that was threatening to leave her lips at their lovestruck expressions. "Oh no," she frantically backpedaled. "I'm the last person you would ever want teaching you about that."

"But Haruno-senpai, everyone's totally into you!" Moegi pouted.

"What?"

"Tell us your secrets! Do you use a special perfume? Bat your eyes and lick your lips? The fallen pen trick maybe? Or the bend and snap? That's it, isn't it!"

Suddenly overwhelmed, Sakura beat a hasty escape as they got lost in their twittering. The bend and snap? She stifled her snort of incredulity. That was Ino's thing. _Boys_ were Ino's thing in general. Maybe she should refer them to her blonde friend. It would certainly tickle her feminine ego.

"Haruno! Get your perky ass over here!"

She glared at a grinning Kisame who stood with a group of guys, some whom she didn't recognize. Draping her towel around her shoulders, she made her way over while tying up her hair in a loose bun and completely oblivious to their curious gazes.

"Meet the rest of the varsity team," Kisame introduced. "Team, Mermaid. Mermaid, Team."

Sakura ignored the nickname. "Nice to meet everyone," she greeted, suddenly a bit self-conscious. "I'm Sakura."

She was quickly swept into a pair of arms then, blonde hair filling her vision. "I've already heard a lot about you, Pink. My name's Deidara and-"

"I'm Tobi!" Said junior easily shoved the blonde aside and wrapped himself around her.

"Tobi! I'm going to fucking kill you!"

"Stay away from Saku-chan! I've already claimed her!"

"What the hell, Hidan! Lay the fuck off!"

Sakura wiggled her way out of flailing limbs and scuttled behind Itachi. "Are they always like this?" she asked, holding back a bout of giggles when Kisame wrapped a large hand around the back of Tobi's neck and growled at Deidara, while proceeding to stomp the shit out of Hidan.

He glanced over his shoulder at her. "Yes. Some days are better than others."

Sakura's laughing green eyes met his before narrowing accusingly. "How come you didn't tell me you were on the swim team?"

He turned around to fully face her, dark eyes subtly taking in her long toned legs, her enticing curves, and how the bathing suit did absolutely everything to enhance them and nothing to hide a stray pink lock into her hair tie, he smirked and Sakura thought it looked quite predatory.

"I'm co-captain, actually. Welcome to the swim team, Sakura."

"Get away from her, Itachi!"

**…**

When Sakura was in the water, everything else disappeared. A mermaid? She smiled as she took a breath and continued her freestyle down the lane. Maybe it wasn't far from the truth. Reaching the end, she grabbed the ledge and pulled up her goggles.

"Nice job, Haruno."

Sakura grinned and grabbed Kisame's offered hand. He hauled her out of the water as if she weighed nothing at all. Turning around, she caught Itachi and Deidara jumping into the pool. They were both practicing their butterflies and _damn_...

"Bunch of showoffs," Kisame scoffed.

"They're really good," Sakura breathed, her eyes glued to their forms.

Her blue haired captain smirked and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "Only when they want to be. Since you appear to have more patience than the rest of us, I wanted to ask if you wouldn't mind coaching the new recruits with Itachi."

"Kisame?"

He raised a brow.

"You do realize I'm also a new recruit."

He grinned. "But you're a third year and made varsity. What more is there to say?"

"I don't have a choice, do I?"

"Hell, no."

"Kisame?"

"Yes, mermaid-chan?"

"You're a little sadistic."

He tightened his hold around her shoulders, and Sakura wondered if he had taken that as a compliment. Judging from his grin and glowing eyes, that would most definitely be a yes.

"You have no idea."

**...**

Sakura walked out of the locker room in a pair of athletic shorts and a sweater, both of her bags slung across each of her shoulders.

"Haruno-senpai! Wait!"

Jumping, she made a mad dash out of the double doors and into the courtyard, fully intent on avoiding more awkward 'boy advice' conversations with the younger females. No way in hell was she getting snagged in that. Now a safe distance away, she breathed a sigh of relief and headed towards the front gates.

"Sakura!"

She turned at the sound of her name and noticed Kisame and Deidara coming her way. Smiling, she waved and waited for them to catch up.

Deidara threw an arm over her shoulder as they exited the academy gates. "I like you, Sakura."

She raised a brow. "I'll take that as a compliment. Though I get the feeling you don't like very many people, do you?" Nevermind that today was the first time they had met.

"Nope. I think this is the start of a beautiful thing. You're a third year and I'm a third year…"

Kisame butted in, glaring at the blonde flirt and silently telling him to shove his womanizing ways. "We're having a study session tomorrow for Hatake's first exam. Drop by the third music room, second floor."

Deidara snorted. "It's more of an excuse to eat junk food and hang out. Call it what it is, Kisame, yeah."

"Shut up, Dei. Anyway, be there. Captain's orders."

"We'll see you tomorrow, mermaid-chan!" They turned right onto another block and she watched as they got lost among the small sea of people milling down the sidewalks.

Was it strange to feel as comfortable as she did around these new people? To feel as if she was reacquainting herself with some childhood friends she'd simply lost touch with through the years? Sakura liked to think she was a decent judge of character. Rooted in common sense and optimistic, caring (sometimes to a fault), but practical. She was a glass half full kind of girl. A maker of lemonade in the most sour of situations. With a sigh that was equal parts resigned and content, she shook her head and crossed the street. For a bunch of sharks, they didn't seem to have very sharp teeth, but Sakura supposed that only time would tell.

When she got home, she found her father dozing on the couch with empty cups of ramen next to him. Huffing in disapproval, she grabbed a thin blanket from the closet and padded over. As she spread it over him, Sakura noticed the photo he held. Warm memories flooded her thoughts. A watery smile touched her lips.

"I miss her, too."

"You look more and more like her every day, Sakura."

She jumped at the sound of his voice. "You were awake?"

He cracked open a green eye before snuggling into the blanket. "Can you blame me? It's not every day my darling daughter tucks me in."

Sakura rolled her eyes, unable to suppress the smile. "You're ridiculous."

"She'd be so proud of you, you know"

"I know."

"It'll be ten years on Friday...what do you say we visit her?"

She nodded before raising a brow. "You know you're not Naruto and can't live off ramen, right?"

His stomach rumbled then and she laughed. "I'll get dinner started."

As Sakura tutted around the kitchen, he stared at his wife's photo, wishing she was still here. "We're doing okay, Mirya...we're doing okay..."

**...**

_...to be continued…_

_Nods of inspiration to Legally Blonde, Ouran, and Mars. I honestly don't know where this baby is going, so like you, I'm just here to enjoy the ride...  
><em>

_-d_


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Naruto does not belong to me.

**Sharks and Mermaids**

_Chapter Three_

…

"I'm fine! And no, there aren't any guys trying to deflower me! What the fuck, Naruto?"

"Sakura! Teme just hit me!"

"Oi, Naruto, don't touch the fucking hair…"

Sakura rubbed her temple. Even when they were hundreds of miles away, they still got on her nerves. As Sasuke put the blonde into a headlock, his face suddenly grew serious.

She stopped him before he could even begin. "Don't look at me like that. I said I was fine here."

Sasuke sighed, grunting when Naruto karate-chopped his ribs. "I believe you, Sakura. We're just…"

She grinned then, wishing they were here in person instead of her just looking at a phone. What she would give to pull them both into bear hugs and then proceed to thoroughly tease the shit out of them. "Awww, Sasuke-kun, do you _miss_ me?"

"Don't get carried away."

"Of course we fucking miss you, Sakura! Do you see these baby blues? These tears!" Naruto howled, shoving Sasuke over so he could do a closeup.

"You want to huuuug me," she sing-songed. "You want to kiiissss me."

"Yeah, on that gigantic forehead of yours," Sasuke deadpanned. She could see the lightheartedness in his eyes though, even through a camera lens.

Sakura burst out in laughter. "But adorable nonetheless."

"Hn."

"For what it's worth, I miss you guys, too. But honestly, it isn't so bad here. I've made some friends and they're...interesting."

"Interesting?" Sasuke mimed, not at all fooled.

"As in _boy_ interesting? Don't you remember anything I said?" Naruto shouted. "Boys are evil! Stay away from them!"

Sakura stuck her tongue out. "Yes, interesting. And they like to swim, so there! We have something in common."

Sasuke's lips thinned before he exhaled in resignation. "Ino and everyone else says hi."

Sakura smiled, knowing it was his way of letting the issue drop because he knew they weren't going to win this battle. "Tell them hi back. I've gotta go though, study session. I'll talk to you guys later, okay?"

Saying their goodbyes, she ended the call and got to her feet. At times like these, she really did miss her small seaside town and her friends. But gazing at the splendor of Konoha Academy, the blossoming trees that were her namesake...she wondered, maybe even hoped, if this could be home too.

…

Sakura contemplated _Music Room 3 _before turning the doorknob. It was quiet on the other side, but for all she knew, the entire room was probably soundproof. Did she really wa-

The door swept open and in she tumbled, catching herself at the very last second before faceplanting into the rather lush looking carpet. _Well, no backing out now._

"Sakura!" Tobi grabbed her wrist and pulled her toward the group of desks haphazardly thrown together. Itachi was strewn on a maroon loveseat nearby, eyes closed with a book across his chest. Was he _napping_?

Trying not to drop the multiple bags she carried, she tugged Tobi to a stop. "Hey, slow down there a little. Trying not to fall on my face, here."

His lips began to tremble. "T-Tobi's so sorry, Sakura!"

"It's okay!" she rushed, waving her hands to placate him. "Don't worry about it! Next time, just be careful. Girls are...umm...delicate, so you need to handle them with care."

His eyes grew round as he nodded. "Is Sakura delicate?"

She laughed, placing the bags on a desk. "Far from it, Tobi."

"But Sakura is so soft and pretty! Like a doll!"

Her cheeks reddened and she quickly turned to hide the blush, rummaging through one of the bags. "Uh, thanks, Tobi."

"Don't you think so, Itachi-nii?"

She glanced over her shoulder and caught the flash of amusement in his too dark eyes as he walked over. "Hnn...very soft and pretty, Tobi."

Now he was just teasing. She rolled her eyes. "Fucking charmers…" she muttered. "Say, you two wouldn't happen to be related?"

Tobi weaved his arm through hers, nodding with so much enthusiasm she was afraid he'd give himself whiplash. "Tobi and Itachi-nii are cousins!"

She held a red bento in her hands as she contemplated the pair. The black hair. Dark eyes. Tall, fit build, from swimming no doubt. And once again, the air of familiarity floated around her and she couldn't quite grasp why.

"A penny for your thoughts?" Itachi asked.

Sakura bit her lip before shaking her head. "I'll let you know when I figure it out. In the meantime, I thought we might get hungry while studying, so here." She opened the lid of the bento and Tobi's eyes widened.

"Onigiri! Tobi loves Sakura! Love, love, love!"

She offered some up to Itachi, who gladly took one and bit into it. _What the...how does he make eating onigiri look fucking sexy as hell?_ She mentally face-palmed herself and quickly gathered her wits about her.

"Delicious," Itachi commented, swiping another.

"What's delicious?" Kisame asked as he, Deidara, and Hidan walked through the door, plastic bags bursting with snacks in hand.

"Sakura!"

…

"So...what the what?"

She smacked Hidan across the shoulder for the hundredth time. "Pay the fuck attention."

Deidara and Kisame snickered, ignoring Sakura's death glares. No wonder Kisame had jumped at partnering with Itachi. Hidan had the attention span of a fucking gnat.

"So what are you and Tobi doing here, anyway?" Sakura asked the blond.

"Gai-sensei is Hatake's ultimate rival. Let's just say it pays to sit in on these."

"Gai-sensei...the one with the bowl cut, bushy brows and green sweat suit?"

Deidara nodded. "Gotta give him credit, yeah. One of a kind for sure."

"So Sakura-chan, what part of Okinawa are you from?" Kisame asked as he leaned back to stretch.

"Uzushio, it's a small seaside town," she fondly answered.

Itachi choked mid tea sip, but quickly recovered. Turning his focus back to Sakura, who at the moment was trying to hide her laughter and failing miserably, he repeated, "Uzushio?"

She nodded. "Can I just say best waves ever? You guys would probably love it there."

"Itachi-nii, doesn't Uncle live there?" Tobi asked thoughtfully as he bit into a piece of cake.

"Aa."

"We've been, actually," Kisame added. "I've got a few cousins there. Though it's been awhile."

As Sakura sat there, calmly taking a bite out of a donut Deidara had passed over, she suddenly choked as a light bulb went off. Hidan sprang into action and started pounding between her shoulder blades. Deidara passed a bottle of water and after shoving her half eaten donut into Hidan's mouth to get him to stop, she took a few sips and wiped her mouth.

"Itachi?"

His eyes filled with amusement, as if he already knew what she was going to ask. "Yes, Sakura?"

"You wouldn't happen to be an _Uchiha_, would you?"

"Of course we are, Sakura!" Tobi piped in, as if was the most obvious thing in the world.

"And you wouldn't happen to have, by some crazy chance, two uncles, a cousin who calls himself Shisui, and a younger brother named Sasuke?"

"Shit, Sakura, you just named every Uchiha in Uzushio," Deidara whistled, clearly impressed.

"And your cousins, Kisame, wait, let me guess, Zabuza and Haku?"

Kisame sputtered, putting two and two together. "Talk about a small fucking world. _You're the Pink Shark_."

"In the flesh," she breathed, waiting for the world to stop spinning.

"How do you know Itachi's brother?" Hidan asked, finishing off the donut and thinking that they had just shared an indirect kiss. _Fucking_ _sweet._

Sakura couldn't help the bubble of awed giggles, seeing the curiosity in Itachi's eyes as well. "We're pretty close friends...I can't believe you're his precious, most important 'Nii-san'..."

"Aww, Itachi's such an amazing big bro," they all teased among their shared laughter.

And then Sakura scrambled out of her chair and rushed over to him. "Smile!" It was the only warning she gave before she invaded his personal space and pressed the button on her phone. No one caught the '_swoosh'_ of her message though as Sakura sent the rather adorable photo of her and Itachi to Sasuke, captioning it with '_You never fucking told me your brother went to KA!'._

"Picture time!" Tobi jumped up and the next whirlwind half hour was spent taking photos with her very first study group at Konoha Academy.

A while later as they gathered their things and cleaned up Music Room 3, Itachi's phone vibrated with an incoming message.

'_Nii-san...please keep your hands to yourself. Sakura is a good friend and therefore off limits.' _

Itachi smirked before attaching another photo. '_Too little, too late, otouto...'_

He couldn't help but feel that life just got a whole lot more interesting now that Sakura Haruno was around.

…

"Sakura…"

She flopped on the bed, rolling her eyes at her phone. "Two times in one day, Sasuke? You must really miss me."

"You didn't tell me you knew Itachi."

"And you didn't tell me he went to KA."

"I didn't even know you were going to KA."

She snorted. "I told you! You just chose not to listen."

"Hn…"

"What's the big deal, anyway? He seems like a good guy, Sasuke. And so do the others." Silence met her on the other end before he finally released a long suffering sigh. "They're loud and obnoxious and…"

"Seriously? Are you describing us or them? Remember when you thought I was the most annoying thing in the world and I told you you could take your ice stick and shove it?"

"We're different."

"Stop being unreasonable. And overprotective for that matter. You're supposed to be the cool, aloof bad boy that every girl crushes on, not a cockblock. Dare I say you're turning into Naruto?"

"Don't compare me to that idiot."

Sakura snorted. "You've met all these guys, Sasuke, and you know what they're like. Do I have anything to worry about?"

More silence.

"I thought so."

"Itachi will watch over you. I told him not to touch you though."

"You did what?"

"I told him to keep his hands off you, that you were off limits."

She huffed in exasperation. "What if I want his hands on me?"

"I was afraid of that."

Sakura almost choked on thin air. "Give me a fucking break! Would it kill you to have a little more faith in me?"

"It's not you. It's them. Nii-san can be most charming and very convincing when he wants to be, but he usually doesn't care for much. This is…" Sasuke sighed on the other end. "I think you grossly underestimate your own allure sometimes."

Sakura wasn't able to catch the last part as the words had been mumbled. "Will you stop being so cryptic? Everything's going to be fine."

"Just...be careful, Sakura, or I'll be forced to drag you back here myself."

"You'll have to go through 'Tou-san first."

"Hn...on second thought…maybe I'll send Uncle instead."

...

…_to be continued…_

Credit to Miss Congeniality must be given. And OHSHC of course for its continuous inspiration.

-d


End file.
